Thursday, May 9, 2013

How Do Chickens "Do It?" Chicken Sex Explained



Well this wasn’t the post I had planned on doing today, but when I trotted outside with my camera to capture some artistic chicken shots on this glorious day, I was treated to a real lens full. Compliments of my Swedish Flower Hen rooster (yes – that is an oxymoron, but the capitalized part is the actual breed name) and one of his Swedish Flower Hen… hens, I found myself with the material for an educational course on the birds and the bees… with an emphases on the birds.

You know? This may seem in rather poor taste to post all of this, but if you are reading this blog, chances are you live on a farm or farmette, or at very least you have or want chickens. I think those of us who are farmers or farmers at heart realize that animals aren’t exactly shy about what (or who) they do or where/when they do it.

(Photo source unknown, but clearly brilliant!)
 So please consider this a warning. If you are easily offended or embarrassed, 

Stop Reading NOW!


*****************



If you are still reading, I will assume that you will not be offended or call me out for posting chicken porn on this blog. Further, I will assume you are either curious about how eggs get fertilized, or you simply can't live without knowing how I am going to approach this delicate subject in such a public manner.


As the mother of 3 children, it would be all to easy to start out with, "When a daddy chicken loves a mommy chicken very, very much..." 

But you know? We're all grownups here. These are chickens, not humans, so let's keep it real. 

It all begins with a hormonally-charged rooster looking for all the world as if he is using Joey's line from the sitcom Friends... "How you doin'?"


Then the Fabio side of Mr. Roo (his name is Gunnar) kicks in for the foreplay. If he could speak, I think it might sound something like: "Hello very fine lady. Do you see the lovely and flamboyant dance that I do just for you. I have lowered my shockingly well-formed wing so as to allow you to see my beautiful feathers. You are impressed, no?"




"Are you not paying attention to my amorous advances, sexy lady? Do you not think me divine?"










"Shall I share my awesomeness with you?"


And here, you can practically hear Astrid's exclamation of "Ooofff" as Gunnar takes a sudden and rather clumsy leap onto her back and balances with one foot on either of her shoulders.


The act that follows takes the balance and skill of Tom Cruise's character in Mission Impossible as he navigates some ridiculously unrealistic obstacle course of deadly laser beams that we all know were electronically added in during editing. (As an aside, I initially spelled "obstacle" wrong and my spell check wanted to change it to "obstetrical." Hmmm... very insightful for my little HAL 9000.)
"Watch as Gunnar delicately navigates this obstetrical course..."

Sometimes Gunnar uses his wings much like a tightrope walker uses a balance pole. Hey - it takes skill to stand on someone's shoulders while having "relations" with them... not that I would know from experience.. but... ahem - moving right along...


The above photo that captured the actual 2 seconds where the "home run" happened.



"When a rooster mates with a hen, he mounts her and, standing on her back, lowers his cloaca (vent) and the hen inverts her own cloaca to meet with his. There is no penetration, but the sperm packet released by the male is taken into the hen's cloaca or vent. From there the sperm makes its way to the infundibulum where it awaits the release of an ovum. Sperm can live in the infundibulum for more than 2 weeks."

Yeah - about 2 seconds is all the splendor in the grass that hen can expect.

Chicken folks will call this part "head-skating", "shoulder-surfing" or just "mating."
(And I call this postition, "The Vulture" he whispered softly into her ear as he fell off her back.)

That's right... shake it off!

A quick, post-coital snuggle...

"Quick! Act like nothing happened! Here comes one of my other wives!"

"I'll call you... "
And then comes the egg - though it can take a few days for eggs to be fertile after the first mating of a hen and roo. Also, eggs can be fertile for up to 3 weeks following the last 2-second romantic encounter between birds.


Even hens without roosters in the yard can go broody, but of course only fertile eggs will hatch.

"Look at me when I'm screaming at you, Mr.! First I push about a dozen objects larger then my own head out of my cloaca, and then I have to SIT here for 21 days! Did you HEAR that? Twenty-one days... while you... what? While you're off doing the wing-dance for that hussy, Ginger!"

And then come chicks!


And that, my friends, is where baby chickens come from!


***

105 comments:

  1. Lol, excellently written :D x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. DucksChickensGoatsAugust 8, 2017 at 6:43 PM

      I could not keep from laughing...LOL. Our rooster, Humble[he is not humble but he was... 4 roosters ago], says "My, my, my, aren't you looking good," to the submissive hens and to the rebel hens.... he sneaks up and an angry hen and no quick snuggle...LOL

      Delete
    2. great read, great humour and loving the sign. Go back to the urban jungle city slickers lol

      Delete
    3. I couldn't hold the laughter,, this is amazing!!

      Delete
    4. I LAUGHED SOOO HARD BOUT FELL OUT OF MY CHAIR!!! 🤣🤣🤣

      Delete
  2. great review for those of us new to chickens! I will bookmark this. We have 4 week old chicks, and don't yet know which will be roos or hens. My kids will enjoy the tutorial as a preparation for what they will observe down the road....Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  3. :D
    Now...how many times can a rooster mate in a day?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'll see your trivia question and I'll raise you a link:

      "A rooster may mate from 10 to 30 or more times per day, depending on the availability of hens and competition from other roosters." See more information HERE.

      Delete
    2. 10 to 30!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Better get those boys a LOT OF LADIES!

      Delete
    3. Does the rooster have to breed the hen once for each fertile egg, i.e., once a day since she lays once a day?

      Delete
    4. Pigpie1 -
      A single breeding may fertilize many eggs.
      =)

      Delete
    5. Lucky bastard, 10 to 30 times?

      Delete
  4. Some males mate many more times than that. I have not counted exactly, however a few days ago I noticed my cockerel mating one particular hen over 12 times while I was outside. He mated all of them several times, but that one it seemed he was never far away from. I have a pullet in with the baby's because he will not leave her lone and she is molting. She does not have feathers on the back of her head at all..nothing to hang on to, so he grabs her skin. She now will sport a scar. I wish I had put a stitch in it or super glued it the day it happened. It might have healed better. I put her back after a week and it happened again. No fertile eggs from her for a while.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poor thing! Not only does she need a hen saddle, but a hen hat, too! Perhaps a full-hen bodysuit?

      Delete
    2. So, Vicki, do you ever recommend having an apron or do you just separate them in this kind of situation? What about for those of us who do not have a place for separation...what do y'all recommend?

      Delete
    3. Once the hen is sitting on 5 - 7 eggs, should we separate the rooster from the hen so that she is able to sit on her clutch, or do we give him "free range" to keep mating her? Will she not allow breeding if she is sitting on a clutch?

      Delete
    4. Pigpie1 -
      There is no need to separate the rooster from the hen. When she is sitting she will not lay new eggs. The rooster may mount her, but it will not result in anything.
      =)

      Delete
    5. I agree with Bulldogma, May 2013; I read that if a hen is mounted too many times it could cause a tear in the skin. And they also recommended the hen saddle, in that case.

      Delete
  5. Fabulously done! And I learned something. Thanks.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Very well done! & a beautiful roo

    ReplyDelete
  7. egg.. chicken egg... chicken..
    hmmm.. so... it was the chicken.. right? answer to who came first..?

    alex.. i'll have sex with birds for 2000$ oops.. that kinda came out wrong.. so wrong.. but i just cant erase it..

    ReplyDelete
  8. Great post. I hope you'll come link up to our Blog Hop.
    http://www.fresh-eggs-daily.com/2013/05/from-farm-blog-hop-39.html

    ReplyDelete
  9. Haha I love this post! I have seen this mating ritual so many times with my chickens. Roosters can get pretty rough! I didn't know that there wasn't actually any penetration with the sex though. Interesting! Great photos too, really high quality shots!

    Visiting from the "From The Farm Blog Hop" today.
    Tammy
    ourneckofthewoods.net

    ReplyDelete
  10. BDM--Loved your play-by-play!! I loved out loud more than once. The kids just shake their heads at me. :) Excellent article!!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Well . . . wonderful article. And now I'm going to have a cigarette and a nap. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  12. Thank you for the lesson and laughs. I just gave my beautiful roo away because the act looks so violent to me. Whatta I know.? I'm just a city girl and new to this chicken raising thing but having fun learning.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It can look a bit violent... and even more so with young cockerels. Yet, chickens have been doing this since the dawn of time. :-)
      Leigh

      Delete
  13. My kids simply say they are doing the "Chicken Dance"...kind of give that song a whole new meaning! LOL Thanks for the great info!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. LOL....Thanks for the way you explained..l was embarrassed to ask someone..very funny...Bless you.

    ReplyDelete
  15. HILARIOUS!!! I LOVE IT!!! You are a funny lady!

    -Lea-

    ReplyDelete
  16. Leigh, you are wonderful!!!! Most entertaining, and I might add, informative. Hell, this was better than Gone With The Wind!

    ReplyDelete
  17. absolutely amazing

    ReplyDelete
  18. I rather enjoyed that lessin on chicken mating.........I nearly killed bantam rooster the other day because I thought his wing was him picking fights with the hens My husband laughed at me. So thanks because I still didnt get what he really was doing. How cute! now that I know, its kinda funny.

    ReplyDelete
  19. I loved it!! I love your openess and how to create that secial momment (of 2 seconds) so real!! It's a teaure just to read your blog and I just found you 30 mins ago! I will be watching...and reading OFTEN!! I have 12 girls and one ROO (had 7, all outside of the coop, but for various reasons, last one won the title of "SURVIVOR" (didn't get the million or whatever the $$ is on TV) but he got to go in the coop... and he struts!! Definately struts!! LOL

    ReplyDelete
  20. My rooster is not mating with my hens..any suggestions?
    Actually he is only mating with one hen..not with others..what to do?

    ReplyDelete
  21. It is not uncommon for a rooster to have a favorite hen. In some cases a more dominant hen will actually try to prevent the rooster from mating with the other hens.

    First - check the eggs of the other hens for fertility. Unless you are out in the chicken yard watching the flock all day, it is possibly you are just not seeing the rooster mating the other hens. Here is an article on checking eggs for fertility:
    http://naturalchickenkeeping.blogspot.com/2013/01/how-to-tell-if-your-chicken-eggs-are.html

    If they are not fertile and you are wanting to breed and hatch chicks, you may need to get another rooster or separate a hen that is preventing the rooster from mating with the other girls.
    Good luck!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If the link doesn't work, copy and paste this (the whole thing) into your browser address bar:

      http://naturalchickenkeeping.blogspot.com/2013/01/how-to-tell-if-your-chicken-eggs-are.html

      Delete
    2. So if a hen is preventing the rooster from mating with other hens, is it jealousy?

      Delete
    3. There could be a number of reasons for this behavior. A dominant hen may feel jealous, or she may feel she is protecting the other hen. Does she regularly pick on this hen and chase her away from the food? Or are they best buddies?

      Delete
  22. So there's no such thing as a bird's penis?

    If the female's cloaca needs to be opened upward voluntarily, does that mean that there is no bird rape? (Unlike, say, dogs who will gang-rape a bitch in heat despite her obvious distress.)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Chickens do not have penises, but ducks and some other types of birds do.

      As far as "rape..." this depends on your use of the word. Yes - cockerels and roosters will gang up and "rape" a hen, causing her distress and even injury. Technically a penis is not necessary for rape.

      Delete
  23. OMG this was great, I had hens and roosters when I was little and for the longest time I wondered how the chicken laid a fertile egg just from being stood on by the rooster! My parents said that all he had to do was stand on her not that anything went inside of her. I'm glad you posted this I was really curious.

    ReplyDelete
  24. That was well-written and informative. Thank you for an excellent blog post!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Holy cluck, that was interesting.

    ReplyDelete
  26. My young rooster is raping one of my chicks and it's very sad.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Great detailed information, I ll be visiting you more frequently, here is very interesting information.

    Lightboxes Sydney & Banners Sydney

    ReplyDelete
  28. Great photos!! I like the realness of your writing mixed with humor. Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  29. Awesome way of painting the real play with words...loved it! I was really curious... and thnx a lot for the interesting info...

    ReplyDelete
  30. Awesome way of painting the real play with words...loved it! I was really curious... and thnx a lot for the interesting info...

    ReplyDelete
  31. So what if I only want eggs and not chicks just yet? Do I need to separate the rooster from the hens

    ReplyDelete
  32. So what if I only want eggs and not chicks just yet? Do I need to separate the rooster from the hens

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The farmer's rooster was so enthusiastic, that the hens were getting all worn out. So. he put a bell around the rooster's neck, toy give the hens a chance to get out of the way. He realized, after a day or two, that he didn't hear the bell any more, and thought it have fallen off. But watching the rooster, he found it was grabbing the bell in his beak, so he could sneak up on them. He took his chickens to the county fair, and mentioned his smart rooster to a couple of friends. The judges heard about it, and gave his Rooster special awards - The no-bell award, and the Pullet surprise.

      Delete
    2. Hilarious!! Sneaky rooster!

      Delete
  33. That was AWESOME. You are a natural at ad-libbing. Lol lol I could not stop laughing all the while completely understanding this. I have 6 hens & 1 Rooster whos name is Roo lol lol not very creative on my name picking but my roo is exactly explained 100% on your clever, humorous blog on typical male rituals. Only chicken owners can appreciate this. Thank you sssssoooo much. Now I truly can tell my grandchildren about the birds & the bees.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Answered my question! i thought i had three hens and one rooster....after watching this, i am pretty sure we have two roosters. Thank you!

    ReplyDelete
  35. Haha! great educational experience! Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  36. Better than 50 Shades of Gray

    ReplyDelete
  37. Better than 50 Shades of Gray

    ReplyDelete
  38. LMAO this has been the BEST Sunday morning read! Thank You for the loll's and info!!

    ReplyDelete
  39. This was fantastic. I only read it because my daughter chose "Chickens" on one of the programs on ABCMouse.com, and I thought to myself, "How do chickens have sex..."
    This was awesome. I'm going to have my husband try standing on my shoulders next time...

    ReplyDelete
  40. It is a necessary a rooster mat every day with hens because of egs. Because I read one time hens no need to mat for making eggs. She can make eggs without mat please reply my question.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No. Roosters do not need to mate every day and hens do not need to mate at all to lay eggs.
      :-)

      Delete
  41. Perfect timing! We just got a rooster so my kids are wondering why hes "attacking" our hens. Guess this will be a great intro to our birds and the bees talk ;)

    ReplyDelete
  42. Hiya mate. Bit too rude for me and I found this article deeply concerning.

    Next time please do not include pictures of full-frontal bare back chicken action when trying to describe one of nature's most beautiful events.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ... there's was a warning before the articles you could have just not read it. You were warned, so your comment is really not fair.

      Delete
  43. CAN MY CHICKEN LAY FERTILE EGGS EVEN IF IT HAS ONLY MATE WITH A ROOSTER ONCE?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, it can. And a hen can lay fertile eggs for up to 2 weeks after they last breed with a rooster.

      Delete
    2. Here I am a 72 year old woman who was around chickens most of my life but never really understand how chickens mate Thanks so much for this lesson and no real understanding of how chickens mate I grew up around animals and I often wondered about the chickens I knew how all of the other animals mated but I can never understand how the chick instead how often had to help to clean and dress chickens and I would look for the mating part but I could never find them so happy to find this out before I leave this side thanks a lot

      Delete
    3. Our age does not matter... it is a wonderful thing to learn something new every day we are here!
      :-)

      Delete
  44. Hilarious, educational...and thought-provoking, as follows:

    Apparently male chickens are jerks, male dogs are jerks, male cats are jerks, and male dolphins are jerks; and female chickens, dogs, cats, and dolphins do not have a good time during sex. My curiosity has been piqued and I am now researching who else among the female animal kingdom has to put up with this; but I am posting in advance of research results. In contrast, only a relatively small percentage of male humans are jerks (although they are not difficult to find); and the less-jerkly ones are perfectly capable of showing a lady a good time, and even remaining non-jerkly afterwards. Human females with well-honed jerk-detectors and a reasonable amount of prudence have excellent chances of avoiding human male jerks; and should appreciate, let's say, being human.

    ReplyDelete
  45. Funny post! And educational. Thank you, I enjoyed learning about it!

    ReplyDelete
  46. I love the way you gave your Roo a voice. Hilarious and very creative. Love the sign about the farm animals, cracked my Aunt and me up.

    ReplyDelete
  47. Awesome illustration, picture painted crystal clear. Note wanted to ask, do roosters only climb hens for the sense of pleasure only or they know they have a duty of fertilization?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We can't be certain. I have personally never been a rooster, so I am not sure what they feel. Scientist believe roosters are driven by their nature to insure there is offspring.

      Delete
  48. What a great read, NEVER new That the sex life of a correctly pronounced' ROOSTER AND HEN could be so rewarding to read and a great laugh as I read it aloud to my friend all because of me telling her she counted her chickens before the eggs hatched and then I remembered they were called something besides chicks or chickens, she didn't believe me so I asked Siri and chose yours, what a great read, but without being to vain the way of my reading it as me being the voice of the rooster and the hen it was the funniest thing and the most I've laughed in 2017

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm always glad to make education entertaining!
      ;)

      Delete
  49. I always wondered how they have sex and chicks, I just thought it looked stupid!

    ReplyDelete
  50. Very informative, but it's still not clear to me whether hens will lay eggs even when there is no rooster around? And if so, does having him around make any difference at all? Feminists of the world arise!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes - hens WILL still lay eggs without a rooster within miles. The eggs just won't be fertile.
      Your feminist hens won't miss having a rooster one bit! LOL!
      =)

      Delete
  51. Human females also expel unfertilized eggs when males are not around about once a month. It's called menstruation. When males ARE around and an egg is fertilized by a male, an embryo is formed, a fetus develops, and a new chick (or dude) is born after about nine months.

    ReplyDelete
  52. Rooster: QuicK! Act normal my other wife is coming. Hen: Bruh

    ReplyDelete
  53. My name is Joy, I Live in Nigeria. I have 50 cockerel that I am rearing 'cos I love animals. They are one week old and two days. I bought them at a day old. But I notice 35% of the feed in their droplets. Pls how can I increase digestion, assimilation and invariably conversation ratio. Thank you ma'am. I enjoy your blog.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Welcome, Joy!
      The best way to increase digestion and let your birds get the most from their feed is to ferment the feed. If you scroll all the way up to the top of this page, you will find a "Fermented Feed" tab at the top. The article is long, but very informative. The process of fermenting feed for your birds is easy.
      Many blessings -

      Delete
  54. Hi, Really enjoyed your article, I am living in apartment and have 2 months old chicks. Now they are turning big, I keep them in a box about 21". Do they need more space to mate? Shall I buy a big cage for them? Please do reply.
    Thanks alot.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What breed are they? Most breeds of chickens are not well suited for living in a cage that small. Even tiny bantam breeds like Serama need a space that is at least 30" x 24".
      If they are any bigger than Serama, the space will need to be even larger.

      Delete

  55. I ask permission to use one of the images to use on my blog www.peternakmuda.com

    ReplyDelete
  56. Was watching an episode of Seinfeld and wondered how eggs were fertilized. I grew up on a farm but it never came to mind. Thanks for the easy explanation.

    ReplyDelete
  57. Great article! I was sitting around this morning wondering how roosters do it with chickens, honestly, I'm not sure why that popped in my head. thankfully, your article came up in my search, and I was both enlightened and entertained. thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  58. Very enlightening and funny! Also came here through google after this random question came to mind

    ReplyDelete
  59. and here I felt stupid looking it up, "how do chickens mate". Apparently I wasn't the only one with that question, so thank you for the information as well as writing much like I would. I love your sense of humor.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You certainly aren't the only one with this question... in fact this is the all-time most popular post for NCK with (as of today) 520,000 hits.

      Delete
  60. Very well explained great understanding

    ReplyDelete
  61. Wow, I saw this happen today and so I just googled to see what was going on. You write this well and now I’m much more informed about what I saw. The teenage human girl that was standing near me and witnessed it, her remark was “oh-my-god.”

    ReplyDelete
  62. Wow, I saw this happen today and so I just googled to see what was going on. You write this well and now I’m much more informed about what I saw. The teenage human girl that was standing near me and witnessed it, her remark was “oh-my-god.”

    ReplyDelete

Let us know what you think. We LOVE getting feedback!

Your comment may not show up right away. Due to spam I have had to turn Comment Moderation on to prevent the garbage from piling up. Sorry for the inconvenience!